In the Beginning . . .

2020 has been an . . . interesting year. “Interesting” like those vegan black bean brownies your wife made. The ones the dog ate off the counter, proving you wrong when, after describing them as “interesting,” you told your wife “not even a dog would eat these brownies.” 2020 has been interesting.

As we near the end of 2020, however, I find myself having reached something of a personal milestone. I’m heavier than I’ve ever been before! Quarantine champion! The impressiveness of this feat is amplified by the fact that, in college, I followed a strict diet that required me to eat and drink exactly what I wanted at any time of the day or night. On many occasions, second dinner (or was it first breakfast?) would consist of a 2 am chicken quesadilla. I’ve given that up (I can’t stay up that late), but thanks to my quarantine commitment to (a) not exercise and (b) support “local” businesses by eating lunch at a different fast food restaurant every day, I’ve surpassed College Will and claimed the belt for heaviest version of myself.

I’m 5’10” and I weigh 213 pounds. I know that isn’t that heavy. TLC hasn’t called to negotiate a reality show. (I also know that others struggle with their weight in much more profound ways, and by suggesting that I need to lose some weight, I don’t mean to be insensitive to anyone else.) But, the truth is, 213 pounds is heavier than I need to be in order to be healthy (more on that later). And, more to the point, weighing 213 pounds is not conducive to running a fast 5k. Running fast will inevitably require trimming some fat.